My mom cursed me when I was young, that I would have a daughter who makes me as crazy as I made her. And it worked. That child. We will fight. Many times.
I Was just about to watch Shaun of the dead, and there was a preview for son of chuckie. Good gravy. I'm wildly amused, yet terrified at the same time. I had a doll that kinda looked like chuckie, but I called it my Tina turner doll. It was always naked, because it was too big for all my doll clothes. And it's eyes closed when you laid it down. Then one eye would get stuck half way open. And now that I think about it, that was a terrible children's toy! Right along with the anatomically correct baby dolls and the ones that shit. I also had an anatomically correct doll. Jo-Ann. Why I gave a baby a name that should belong to a 40 year old sassy southern lady, I don't know. My girl cabbage patch doll I named Julie Walter, so clearly, naming things is not my specialty. Anyway-joann was amazingly detailed in her anatomic correctness. Her butthole had wrinkles, And different color plastic. She's still at my moms, I think. Now she has sharpie on her head, and is missing two fingers from a run in with the dog.
We bought the girl kid a crapping doll, hoping it would help with potty training. We'd feed it, and wait. 3 minutes later, green pudding oozes out of its ass. Oh, what fun! I get to wipe an ass! What a stupid fucking toy! It's like they're trying to mold little girls to find excitement in the most mundane thing in life. Vacuuming, yes please! A toy kitchen where I can slave for hours, only to be told they don't like it? My dream! A baby that really cries for hours? Heaven! There is even a Barbie that comes with a cat. Ok, Barbie and her pussy. Good toy. BUT it also includes a cat box, and the cat fills with water so you can make it pee. And then the super fun part, scooping the cat box!! Yes! Exposing myself to trichinosis is a blast! People who make those toys are assholes. That stupid pooping doll grew mold in her GI tract, and smelled like an old moldy washcloth. So many fun bacteria were probably building skyscrapers in there. But I couldn't throw it away, because she loved that damn doll. I thought it disappeared, but then it resurfaced a couple years ago. I pulled it out from under kids bed, and it had been attacked by a vicious gang of amateur graffiti artists. It's head head been painted every color imaginable, and there was fur, dingle balls, cut Barbie hair glued all over it, and playdoh dried in her eye sockets. I'll post a pic, if I can figure out how. It looks a little different now. All the fur and dingle balls fell off. It's been in a box for awhile.
